Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
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