The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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