Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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