Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
