Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize