I don't usually arrange sex via text message
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
