Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
