I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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