I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
