You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
