Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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