I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
