They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
