Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
