Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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