i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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