No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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