id be glad to
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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