So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
