have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
