Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
