We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I'm bleeding and have questions
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