So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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