I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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