im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
