Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize