I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
it glows. i had to have it.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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