all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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