two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
