So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize