She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize