He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
