...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
We just shotgunned beers for America
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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