Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
