so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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