her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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