Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
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