Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
My bed smells like the plague
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
