Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
You were trust falling into bushes
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
