There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Princesses don't give blow jobs
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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