I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
