I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
