He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
