Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
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