He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Randomize
