Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Randomize
