party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
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