Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(703): View more from Virginia

someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(703): someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat... http://tfl.nu/oev5

Replies (7) Good night (698) Bad night (1509)
Favorite
(662): View more from Mississippi

Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(662): Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call? http://tfl.nu/dgsg

Replies (6) Good night (1190) Bad night (534)
Favorite
(256): View more from Alabama

I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(256): I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting. http://tfl.nu/bt6j

Replies (21) Good night (4094) Bad night (757)
Favorite
(206): View more from Washington

When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(206): When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle? http://tfl.nu/8gva

Replies (47) Good night (5047) Bad night (643)
Favorite
(980): View more from North Carolina

I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.

(704): View more from North Carolina

oh, you finally did the dishes then?

(980): View more from North Carolina

No, bought new ones.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(980): I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight. (704): oh, you finally did the dishes then? (980): No, bought new ones. http://tfl.nu/21up

Replies (48) Good night (7727) Bad night (1362)
Favorite
(305): View more from Florida

you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(305): you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out http://tfl.nu/dfjh

Replies (20) Good night (5943) Bad night (1144)
Favorite
(913): View more from Kansas

You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(913): You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup http://tfl.nu/bt9z

Replies (9) Good night (1354) Bad night (4419)
Favorite
(313): View more from Michigan

I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot

(313): View more from Michigan

He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(313): I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot (313): He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all http://tfl.nu/6st3

Replies (23) Good night (7785) Bad night (952)
Favorite
(479): View more from Arkansas

Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(479): Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band. http://tfl.nu/kt6h

Replies (3) Good night (2616) Bad night (1095)
Favorite
(425): View more from Washington

No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(425): No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America, http://tfl.nu/18wd

Replies (10) Good night (4073) Bad night (1287)
Favorite
(678): View more from Georgia

Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(678): Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting? http://tfl.nu/j29m

Replies (11) Good night (2358) Bad night (634)
Favorite
(920): View more from Wisconsin

The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(920): The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight. http://tfl.nu/gkvw

Replies (3) Good night (1375) Bad night (757)
Favorite
(412): View more from Pennsylvania

wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(412): wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often http://tfl.nu/efwp

Replies (2) Good night (672) Bad night (289)
Favorite
(856): View more from New Jersey

he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(856): he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime http://tfl.nu/17r4

Replies (2) Good night (665) Bad night (307)
Favorite
(978): View more from Massachusetts

And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(978): And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road" http://tfl.nu/f7q8

Replies (1) Good night (284) Bad night (402)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: