I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
