he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
