I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
